37 yr old male here. I need help. For the last ten or so years of my life I severely avoid eating until about 10pm each day, and then I binge. I am scared to eat because if I do something bad will happen. I only eat when I know that everyone else is asleep, I cant be reached, and when I feel psychplogically safe enough to do so. Its causing me issues after work, keep getting dizzy spells, feel physically exhausted all the time. Its starting to stress me out, ive tried to eat during the day but i get so full of fear and panic that I end up just not trying to eat, it is so much easier for me when I feel starved. I need help i dont know where to go or who to talk to

TW!! There is no tag for actually upsetting topic but trigger warning

I was diagnosed with anorexia back in March and I have been in outpatient recovery since then. But I am so resistant to recovery. I have an eating plan but I still hide food when I can. I don't want to put in the effort to recover. There's no point. Why should I put in the effort for a life I hardly want? The eating disorder has got me out of school, that's great. It has stopped me from seeing my dad which is even better. And if anything, I've developed closer friendships in the last few months than ever before. Everybody is waiting for something to click inside me but I don't think it's going to. And when it does, I'll probably act on my suicidal thoughts. I actually like my body now. I really fucking love it. I love it so much. I don't want to change it. Why should I? I'm not even suffering from any health complications from it. For once I actually like myself and now they're forcing me to change

I've been recovering from long-ish-term malnutrition for around six months. And I've mostly gotten past the psychological issues of eating and am now working on regaining my appetite. I want to be getting the proper amounts of nutrients without overdoing of course in this stage. And educating myself on the nutrients i should be giving myself has been beneficial for my recovery somehow (maybe because it feels like progress im not sure) so i looked into getting a nutritionist or someone like that and i just can't afford it. Especially after the therapy i practically put myself in debt to get better. So I need alternative ways to stay on track. ive been looking into different apps but I'm not sure if thats a good method for this type of thing. so if anyone has advice on either an app or some way I can do this without bankruptcy, that would be nice.

Really struggling with eating more food daily and constantly fall short of calorie targets because I get scared to have snacks to top me up on calories as I don’t track my macros so don’t feel like it’s okay for me eat snacks so restrict the amount I can have

I guess what I’m asking is in eating disorder recovery just how much does macros matter or is it just the case of eat whatever you can to hit goals no matter when or what?

Any advice and tips would be amazing

hello! i’m 17 F and i struggled with anorexia for many years and been in and out of treatment for it. i grew up overweight and got bullied a lot for it and then when i entered high school, i developed anorexia. it’s absolutely ruined my life. i don’t go to in person school anymore, i don’t have friends, i’ve developed co-occurring mental illnesses from it, and i barely leave my house. i almost lost my life to it last year so i finally wanted to get better for myself, but i didn’t do it with any guidance because my parents said they didn’t want to spend any more money on professional help. the past year and a half, i’ve gained a lot of weight. like way more than i’m comfortable with and i’ve become a bullying target again. the ED voice definitely is still in my head and it makes me feel dumb when i say i struggle with eating when it definitely doesn’t look like i do. i want to lose weight but i know how easy it is to slip back into unhealthy habits. i keep telling myself that I’m stronger than this, but there’s a part of he that is scared it’ll get bad again if i even attempt to lose weight. i’m reaching out here to see if anyone has any advice or guidance for a situation like this.

Hi, so this is my first post on this site. So I have been trying to heal myself from binge and purge cycle for a long period of time but always unsuccessful due to me doing it half heartedly and not enough self control/determination . However, im trying really hard this time to progress my recovery cuz I hate my life being like this. After going through what triggers my binge and purge mostly, I found 3 main points that kind of hindering my progress

First, due to my bad mindset of all or nothing, if something did not go to plan accordingly, I tend to binge and purge with the thought of starting clean tmr.

Second, after a meal, I tend to feel so uncomfortably full for 3-4 hours and it made me panic and stress, which led to a purge then led to a binge and purge after.

Last, I still count calories and still had restriction habits, which then led me to an urge but also, if I eat a food without calorie label or high calorie, I tend to panic and feel out of control. Thus, binge and purge again.

The time that I probably did not binge and purge at all was when I was out with my friends or on vacation. However, the moment I step home, I tend to binge and purge.

Also, being tired all the time (sore body) lead me to craving food that will trigger the cycle for sure.
Anyone experiencing something like this and jf so, any advise or practice I could use to help me through this recovery journey. Im really tired of it.

Im just at my wits end by now, I've just been extremely stressed with school and I've been binging nonstop for the part two weeks or more. Today I was just standing Infront of a cake and debating whether to binge on it and you can guess what happened. I just feel like whatever I try to do I can never win this battle and the "just go on a walk" or "text a friend" is bullshit and can't do shit when my problem is I can't walk away. If anyone has gone through this situation before please lend me your knowledge cuz I can't with this anymore 😭

I work in a small supermarket in a student-heavy area (UK). I've noticed this customer that comes in at least every other day, sometimes multiple times a day.

She looks quite underweight but she's always in here buying LOADS of food - like enough for multiple people for a week. But as well as that, she'll always buy 1 or 2 boxes of laxatives at a time, which is worrying bcs she's in here so often buying them ?? The other day i wanted to see if i could notice anything, and she does have marks on her knuckles but i guess they could be from anything ?? Other than that i don't have much to go off except for how ill she looks, but again i don't want to assume.

Idk if im being paranoid because ive known people with bulimia but it all just seems a bit off. Is there anything i can do ??